Why do you write?
waarom schrijf ik?
Men stelt mij deze vraag regelmatig.
In het Nederlands is het zeer gemakkelijk te beantwoorden, ware het niet dat ik er een heel boek voor nodig heb om het verhaal waarom ik schrijf uit de doeken te doen, dus doe ik het maar niet in het Nederlands. Dat is 1 van mijn manuscripten voor later.
Wanneer men mij deze vraag in het Engels stelt op een Amerikaanse website, dan komt de natuurlijke drang naar boven om die vraag net in dezelfde taal te beantwoorden.
En misschien, is dat helderder in het Engels dan wanneer ik het in het Nederlands zou doen. (beknopter)
En dat is waarom ik de Engelse vraag: "Why do you write?" hier ook in het Engels zal beantwoorden.
Jullie mogen dat ook doen, geheel de topic-titel volgend, in het Engels. (of Nederlands)
Vragen mogen ook altijd gesteld worden.
Why do you write?
I do write because i keep getting better and better at it.
I always got a vivid imagination, even before i could read or write, i was busy in my head searching for answers as for example: “Why was there a voice inside me telling me i needed to be quick?”
I believe that was the point i was becoming self-aware, a year or three, mostly four. I realised i could question anything, and i was able to find new questions just by keeping thinking on, questions i was able to generate.
(these questions are actually tools you build in to learn to maximize your inspirational sources, because they drive you forward)
I decided to evolve that, because it felt good.
I didn’t really knew i wanted to become a writer, but in school, at second class, i started to notice a gap between me and the other classmates in my class.
The way i used my mother-language, in practices, felt like i was toying with them, where other classmates seemed to sweat.
For example, when we must write a story, within twenty minutes, i got filled two page’s, where the rest of the class only got half a page. And then my story just got begon, there was never enough time to finish them.
So i decided on that age to ditch any mathematic-practices in my head, so i could keep my full attention on Dutch.
Just enough attention on mathematics to pass at the end of the year. (and it was difficult, but i made always up with everything that got to do with language)
There was however, in my class, another writer as me.
Also wrote small story’s, was very good at writing his own story’s.
There was some hidden competition between us, as we secretly admired each others works.
So i wanted to do better, and i decided to read more complicated lecture.
That competition there was, must have been a good thing for self development, as we secretly understood both that we where on something, but we didn’t really knew what.
I dont know how he further developed, as in high shool, our ways divorced.
What i do know, is that he used more energy on mathematics as i did, so it’s possible his Dutch isn’t as evolved as mine, but certainly, it’s gonna be quality top-tear writing he displays, cause as with me, it was in him.
I was caught in this ‘learning-proces’ which i really liked, but also, i was thinking about overcoming eventual problems that might occur when developing myself somewhere in the future.
I knew i needed to keep an eye to not get caught to much in the thinking-proces.
So i learned myself to stop thinking searching for answers - and trough time, getting them - when it was needed.
The answers popped up without having to recall them, having build in a source of inspiration.
I learned to write in my own language in a way sometimes people don’t believe i wrote it, and even when i prove it, i see that there’s some doubt.
“It must be from the net,” i see some people thinking.
Well, sometimes, when you see writing as an art, know that art only can begin where the imagination of others, ends.
I feel very good writing at the same pace my mind thinks, translating all it’s thoughts, on a flow of thoughts, redirecting and crafting it with my self-consciousness while the words flow.
That’s exactly what i learned myself to do.
I was never sure what i was aiming at, but sometimes, when writing, i came ‘into the zone.’
And when that happened, the story drove itself and because of secret excitement behind it, (as i needed to order all the information that suddenly was available) i became extremely sweaty under my armpits.
Theres much more to it, of course, but i cannot describe everything in English, which is not my native language, not in the way i want it actually.
So i developed my English as well. I developed it by reading lots of different English game-magazines and playing the English games, studying the English story of a particular game for over three years.
I was not sure, but i felt somewhere maybe i could develop the English as well, as it has lots of similarities to Dutch. And the more i studied it, (reading it until i got the picture) the more similarities i saw, making the English for me essentially the same to process as Dutch.
Some kind of emidiate translation of Dutch thoughts towards English printed right here. :)
Not sure exactly how, but i learned it. And there is even more i can learn about the English, but i feel it’s sufficient this way.
I keep reading English all the time, so it develops anyway.
But i don’t want to feel i need to spend energy to increase my English vocabulary, as i spend my energy to increase my Dutch.
I’m thirty-five years old, i started learning English conscioussnely when i was twenty-two- or three.
I also tried to translate the hidden Chinese language each women seems to speak, increasing my empathy to an higher level.
That’s important for a writer, to create characters, in a story for example.
So he can feel what his created character feel in that particular situation bringing seemlesly real emotions over to the reader, as if the character has real thoughts.
I developed anything as good i could be to become the best writer i could possibly be.
So, i hope this helped, there’s lots more to it, but i cannot explain it all in English (with the narrative I usely use) so i hope this gives you an interesting insight.